Life Through Dance

The Whole Picture

By Elizabeth Dickinson

One of the most challenging aspects of taking private dance lessons is the money required. If you enter pro/am competitions, this seems to be true no matter your income or background. Okay, there are a few exceptions; stop reading this if you're one of them!

For me, the conflict lies between Responsible Self and Passionate Self. Responsible Self looks like a cross between angry mother, old-fashioned spinster librarian, and CPA. She spends most of her time saying things like:

"This is a boatload of money you're spending."

"How can you justify this? Nothing is tax-deductible."

"You're addicted. You know what happens to addicts: you end up living on the street with your cat, sharing her food, and trying to sell the crystals that fell off your gown."

And if Responsible Self shows up in a lesson, she's insufferable.

"Why aren't you learning this faster? Do you realize how much money you've spent on this technique?"

"Does your teacher realize how much pressure you're under to pay for this? Why the hell is he talking about anything non-dance-related?"

Occasionally, Responsible Self panics and issues ultimata.

"You're going to have to give this up, you know."

Passionate Self looks like a cross between Glinda the Good Witch and Wonder Woman. She says:

"You feel so much better when you're dancing."

"Look at the shape you're in!"

"What will you talk about if you're not dancing?"

"If you don't dance, you'll wither inside and die. You'll look like Miss Havisham, dressed in a ballgown with missing crystals, clutching faded photos of your dancing days."

"Just a few more lessons, and think how good you'll be!"

"Dancing is inspirational. Terpsichore was the dancing muse. Imagine the goddess's wrath if you give it up."

Passionate Self is often louder than Responsible Self, and her images are much more compelling. So Responsible Self sits on the sidelines, covering her eyes while Passionate Self dances, occasionally looking at financial statements and shuddering. Clearly neither side sees the whole picture.

My own life coach (yes, I do have one myself) recently challenged me to imagine what would happen if both selves worked together. In future issues, I'll let you know how that works out.

May we pursue our paths, making peace between our passionate and responsible selves and dancing within the whole picture.